Singlehood: Dating Sites, Matchmaking and Beyond (Part Two)
Lots of people are looking for love yet how many seem to be achieving their goals?
The modern dating and relationship world is filled with pitfalls and obstacles that make it difficult for genuine seekers to achieve their relationship goals, be they short-term romantic connections, sincere friendships or long-term marriages and partnerships.
While the reasons for this general dissatisfaction are broad and complex, its fair to say that the world has changed radically in a few short decades and this has changed the game when it comes to our social interactions.
Firstly, we are online a lot of the time and this has changed how we interact. We rely on social media and the internet to keep us connected and to communicate with one another. This has spilled over to our relationship quest, with dating sites being more popular than ever as our chosen means of searching for that somebody special.
Secondly, the vastly changing social, economic, political and environmental landscape of our world has brought into question a lot of our traditional views about relationships. While this may have opened up possibilities for connecting in ways that are more about individual choice rather than cultural expectations or social norms, it has left a lot of people more confused than liberated.
The problem in the past might have been that we have too few choices. But the modern dilemma seems to be that we have, in fact - too many choices. And this sense of overwhelm causes us to take shortcuts in the selection process that may not be beneficial to us in the long run.
Matchmaking: Does It Work?
The modern dating world is very hit and miss because we rely on extremely limited information about a person, a lot of which is either distorted or completely untrue. We can use search filters, but narrowing it down to who smokes and doesn't smoke, or who has piercings or who doesn't, won't really give us the edge when it comes to making the correct decision in our love life.
It is logical, yes.
Most matching is done in a very left-brained manner, either from an algorithm or from a matchmaker who takes the information and makes the most logical or reasonable choice.
The problem is that love and the emotion it produces, as well as the raw magnetic chemistry between people is not "logical". You can't tell much about what will work on this level from gathering information about people in the usual way.
While there might be certain hard lines people have in choosing a partner, such as only wanting to be with someone who has the same dietary preference or religious belief, or someone who wants to have children, the reality is that often love and chemistry happens with someone who is quite differerent to ourselves. Opposites do attract. Sometimes.
Having seen the problems and pitfalls associated with dating sites, you can either wing it and hope for the best, or else find a matchmaking agency. This is pretty old-school in most people's mind and a lot of modern people probably don't even realize they still exist. To be true, there aren't many around anymore and it is a highly specialized, even esoteric niche industry.
And, just like with dating sites, there are scammers who will promise the world and run off with your money. There are lazy and uninformed people who won't do anything you can't do yourself. There are bougiouse style "introduction agencies" for the social elite who would probably meet anyway and finally, there are honest, well-intentioned matchmakers and agencies that proclaim to be successful at what they do.
We believe your best shot at finding love or the relationship that rocks your boat is through a consultancy service or matchmaking agency as opposed to dating sites or just throwing caution to the wind. It takes away the randomness and blind naivete and shows that you are serious, genuine and intentional in your search for Mr. or Ms. Right!
Affinity One offers free, no-obligation profile creation for our Silver program, as well as personlised consulting and matchmaking for our Gold and Diamond members. You can reach out to us today (HERE) and let us know what your requirements are. We are here to listen and respond to your relationship goals!